01
Arrive
Tea, settling and time to land. A short opening circle brings us together and establishes clear agreements for the day.
somatic movement · sound · play · connection
Day Into Night
Intimacy.
An afternoon and evening with Gavin and Jamie exploring intimacy through the body, connection and touch.
How close are you to yourself?
Starting with ourselves, we gradually open towards other men.
Saturday 24th October · Pathways Studio · 1pm–8pm
Building slowly.
Before we tend to somebody else, can we be more in touch with ourselves?
We begin with the body. Can I actually feel myself rather than think about myself? Can I recognise what I want? Can I notice when I don't want something? Can I change my mind? Can I experience pleasure without having to achieve anything?
From there we turn towards other men. This is a day for exploring intimacy rather than defining it, through somatic movement, breath, conversation, play, food, touch, self-touch, witnessing and sound. There may be sensual or sexual energy in the room. That isn't something we need to either encourage or avoid. It is simply another part of ourselves we can notice.
01Selfbody · sensation · choice
02Connectionvoice · play · conversation
03Intimacycloseness · touch · being seen
04Pleasurecuriosity · presence · self
05Returnground · sound · rest
1pm → 8pm
We start on the floor,
not in conversation.
The day has time in it. Nothing is rushed towards intimacy. We begin by getting closer to our own experience, move towards other men and the group, and finally return to ourselves again.
02
Self
A long stretch of somatic movement, breath and self-contact. Before thinking about another man: can I actually feel myself? What feels good? What am I drawn towards? Where do I pull away? Can I recognise a yes or a no? What happens when I change my mind?
“Woke this morning still feeling more in tune with myself and looking forward to seeing how that helps carry me through the week.”
W
03
Release
Breath, sound and creative movement. Shaking, moving, making some noise and allowing the body to become a little less managed. Not a performance, another way of noticing what it feels like to be present with yourself.
04
Connection
Can I stay connected to myself while I’m with you? Listening, being heard, play and conversation. We'll share a nourishing meal together. Time to refuel before the evening unfolds. Let ordinary conversation become part of the day. Intimacy does not have to begin with touch.
05
Intimacy
As the day draws in, touch enters slowly: asking, offering, receiving, adjusting and sometimes declining. What is it like to be close to another man without losing contact with yourself? What is it like to be seen without having to perform?
06
Pleasure
We return attention to ourselves through conscious self-touch. It may be comforting, sensual or erotic. Nothing is required and there is no goal of arousal or climax. The practice is noticing what happens when pleasure is not something you have to perform.
“I’m feeling even more connected and unhurried after what we shared yesterday.”
A
07
Return
Floor, breath, blankets and restorative movement. A short closing sharing circle ends the interpersonal part of the day. Then the talking is finished.
08
Soundbath
Nothing more asked of anyone. Lie down, receive the sound and let the day settle. We finish in quiet.
Different kinds of closeness
Who gets to decide
what intimacy looks like?
As gay men, our relationships don't always fit neat categories. Friend. Lover. Partner. Sexual buddy. Ex. Chosen family. Perhaps they don't have to. Can friendship contain physical affection? Can somebody we have sex with also be somebody we care about without becoming a boyfriend? Could we be nourished by several people in our lives offering different forms and degrees of intimacy?
We're not trying to arrive at the correct model. We're interested in the relationships we actually have and the ones we might allow ourselves to have.
Intimacy
Does casual have to mean disconnected?
One-off encounters can be intimate. A long-term relationship can sometimes feel disconnected. A sexual buddy can matter deeply. Friendship can contain enormous tenderness without being sexual at all.
So perhaps the useful question isn't whether a relationship is casual or serious. Were we actually there? Can I encounter another man rather than perform for him? Can I notice what I want, ask what he wants, laugh, change my mind and allow tenderness alongside desire? An encounter can be brief and still contain intimacy.
Connection & disconnection
What helps us connect, and what can leave us feeling disconnected?
Porn, apps, sex, masturbation, alcohol or drugs can all be part of our lives and our pleasure. This isn't a workshop about deciding that some are good and others are bad. We're more interested in noticing our relationship with them.
Am I choosing this or disappearing into it? Does it help me feel more present in my body, or less? Does it help me connect, or sometimes help me avoid closeness? There isn't a correct answer, only space to notice and talk about it without judgement or moralising.
“I felt such warmth, care and generosity of spirit from you both and it’s a wonderful gift to receive.”
D
Facilitated by Jamie & Gavin
Intimacy as an enquiry,
not an achievement.
Jamie and Gavin bring together their experience of yoga, somatic movement, breath, dynamic meditation, mindfulness and sound to create a structured but spacious day. We will move, talk, notice and experiment with closeness, without prescribing how men ought to have relationships or friendships.
SELF
CONNECTION
INTIMACY
CONNECTION
INTIMACY
Circle of Men
Intimacy · Day Into Night
An afternoon and evening exploring intimacy with ourselves and with other men through somatic movement, conversation, play, touch, self-touch, witnessing, food and sound.
Book your place — £75